Sooo here’s the thing! I love the motivational, energetic high that the new year brings.
But also! That doesn’t mean you need to go from 0 to 100 in January. And burn out in two weeks. You can take little baby steps. Or none at all!
Honestly, I think January-and the cold months in general, are THE time to hibernate and rest. It feels natural to?? Like, that’s what my body’s telling me to do more days than not.
And when else are you going to? Do you really expect yourself to “go, go, go!” every single day of the year? That sounds miserable as hell. But I guess if that’s what works for you, knock your self out I guess!
I was like that for years. Mainly because of the constant pressure I’d put myself under. Using that pressure as a means to feel fulfilled. Even if that meant filling my life with pointless busyness. If I didn’t, I’d be like, “Ugh! I’m a lazy piece of shit and wasting my life!” And then of course I burned out after years of nonstop exertion.
We’re human! It’s unrealistic to expect ourselves to show up as our best selves every day as if we’re machines with ON switches. Our lives are open to being affected by external circumstances. Break up? Job layoffs? Injury? Chronic illness? Are machines affected by these things? Not that I know of! Mechanical failures, sure. But other than that, they don’t have things that could affect their energy levels or how they feel and show up on daily basis.
Sometimes you just feel like shit! You don’t have to be like, “Ah! Stop being angry! Bad bad bad! Negative energy!” when it doesn’t feel natural to be your ideal, bubbly self. Listen to your body! You don’t need to shame it into guilt. It doesn’t deserve that! Rest! Go on a crazy rant fest in your journal! Binge watch Vanderpump Rules to let your brain rest too! Do whatever will make you feel better. As long as you’re not hurting anyone else, obviously.
It can be easy to feel like a failure-or like you’re falling behind when you see everyone around you constantly doing things, doing “more”. But helloooo! You’re on your own timeline! And you don’t have to make yourself miserable by expecting yourself to be on theirs. “We suffer more in imagination than in reality.” Also..who’s to say that their busyness is even productive? Maybe it looks like they’re doing a lot of things. But maybe they’re not the things that’ll actually get them to where they intend to go.
Always “doing things” isn’t a prerequisite to achieving your goals. But it can be a prerequisite to hitting burnout before achieving them.
In order for you to show up as your ideal self, whoever you want to be, you need to at least feel okay internally. And everyone has their own way of getting there.
Getting out of bed thirty minutes later than when you originally intended to, skipping a morning walk outside because it’s negative twenty fucking degrees Fahrenheit outside and you don’t want to slip on ice and shatter your tailbone, missing a workout, etc. It’s fine! It’s okay!
That doesn’t mean you’ve tainted your whole year. It takes a while to make new routines habitual. Taking it slow doesn’t equate to making zero progress. You can add new habits into your life in little increments.
You can take action steps by walking. Sitting down to take breaks in between to fuel yourself with the energy to keep going. You don’t have to take your steps by sprinting whilst in fight-or-flight mode.
You don’t have to take your steps in an unsustainable way that’ll just cause you to resent them so much that your dreams no longer seem worth it. Resenting the process so much that you write off your dreams completely and settle for the ones you were afraid to fall back on.
You can just take things day by day. You don’t have to conjure up a narrative about your future based on the narrative of your current day. How one day goes doesn’t dictate how your whole future will go. Having one day, a few weeks, a few months, feel a certain way doesn’t mean your future will feel that way too.
Like many, I have goals for myself this year too. But I’m trying to remember that the pressure I’m so used to putting on myself, rushing to check them all off as fast as I can, isn’t necessary. And it’s definitely not the only path to them.
I’m on the path regardless. I might as well make it enjoyable and have fun along the way.